Communication can be verbal and non-verbal, written and spoken. Let’s talk about words. How many words come out of your mouth each day? The average person speaks about 25,000 words day. That’s about 50 pages in print, which means that every week you speak the equivalent of a John Grisham novel. If all your words were put on paper, each year you would compile a personal library of 50 such novels. That’s a big stack of books. That’s a lot of words, a lot of communicating. Plenty of opportunities for communication breakdowns, for EDD.
Every time there’s a conversation, you’ve got one sinner talking to another sinner – whether it’s in person, on the phone, e-mail, texting, via endless apps. Each sinner/participant has his/her own set of perceptions, realities, frames of reference, protective mechanisms. It’s so easy to be reckless and hurtful in our speech, to try to justify careless words: Hey, I just call ‘em the way I see ‘em. If you can’t handle the truth, you shouldn’t have asked. Hey, I didn’t mean anything by that – you’re way too sensitive – lighten up. I was only kidding. Can’t you take a joke?
We prove over and over again what Jesus said in Matthew 12:34 – “Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.” (NIV84) Sinful hearts and thoughts yield sinful, hurtful words and actions. No amount of earthly training or therapy can fix the condition of our hearts.
This problem goes deeper than EDD with other people. We’re at odds with God by nature. We’re opposed to his Word by nature. The problem not with God and his Word. His Word is clear. The problem is with you and me. If I’m driving without my glasses on and the signs look blurry. Is it the signs’ fault? No, the problem is with me. Likewise God’s Word is abundantly clear, but our sinful nature and mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God’s law nor can it do so.
Think of all the obstacles God had to overcome in order to communicate to us: sin, hostility, unwillingness and outright inability to listen. But he did it through his Son, Jesus Christ. Peter, who had trouble with EDD himself – outbursts of denial and pride for starters – records this in his second letter: “To be sure, we were not following cunningly devised fables when we made known to you the powerful appearance of our Lord Jesus Christ, but we were eyewitnesses of his majesty.” (2 Peter 1:16).
The “majesty” of his ministry, the “majesty” and power of his redeeming work. By virtue of his perfect sacrifice, his perfect life, his bloody death and glorious resurrection, he earned forgiveness of sins for us, for all. And he brought this to us in a very personal way – through the Gospel God made our hearts clean and able to receive his many blessings.
God’s Word doesn’t just help us with communication. God’s Word IS communication. And when Christ redeemed us, he redeemed our speech/communication as well. God’s Word brings families – all of us – back from the edge when it comes to EDD. And Peter, who personally struggled with communication, offers a bonanza of spiritual encouragement to combat EDD. “All of you, live in harmony with one another. Show sympathy, brotherly love, compassion, and humility. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. Instead, speak a blessing, because you were called for the purpose of inheriting a blessing.” (1 Peter 3:8,9)
And this: “But regard the Lord, the Christ, as holy in your hearts. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give a reason for the hope that is in you. But speak with gentleness and respect, while maintaining a clear conscience, so that those who attack your good way of life in Christ may be put to shame because they slandered you as evildoers.” (1 Peter 3:15,16)
Fight EDD. Drop the sarcasm when inappropriate. Purge the urge to put others down. Instead, build others up. Copy Jesus on the e-mails and the text messages. Remember that he’s listening in on phone conversations and watching when you surf the internet. Let your conversation – every personal interaction – be seasoned with salt. God help us to communicate clearly, lovingly, compassionately in Christ.
In Christ Jesus,
Pastor Stephen Luchterhand









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